Heartstrings: A King's Lament
by helenw713
Summary: Jack lectures Yuusei on love, cats, and Izayoi Aki. After all, when his friend is being a fool, there’s only so much the former King can take. Take place between the Dark Signers arc and Season Two. Faithshipping, mentions of Scoopshipping.


**Disclaimer:** I love Jack. Which means that I also don't own him.**  
Story Title:** Heartstrings: A King's Lament**  
Story Word Count: **1,276**  
Rated: **K+/Y**  
Genre:** Friendship/General**  
Focus: **Jack Atlus**  
Pairings:** Faithshipping (Yuusei x Aki), mentions of Scoopshipping (Jack x Carly)**  
Notes:** This takes place after the Dark Signers arc, but sometime before season two. The timeline can be interpreted at will. Written as a transcription of Jack's monologue, directed at Fudou Yuusei. Rated for the slight use of curse words (it is Jack Atlus, after all). Comments, criticism, and suggestions gratefully accepted.**  
Story Summary:** Jack lectures Yuusei on love, cats, and Izayoi Aki. After all, when his friend is being a fool, there's only so much the (former) King can take.

* * *

You, oh mighty King, oh great Signer, oh powerful Head of the Dragon, oh godly connector of Satellite and Neo Domino . . .

No. That's not right.

You, Fudou Yuusei, are being an idiot.

You see, Yuusei . . .

I see things.

You may think that I am unobservant, that I do not notice except to point out my enemy's flaws, but I see things.

After all, that is a duelist's survival, is it not?

But no.

I know that you never thought that.

Crow did.

Kiryu did.

Godwin did, Mikage did, those twins did, Izayoi did. They _still_ do.

Not you.

You are a maker of bonds, Yuusei. You connect people. You . . .

No matter what others say, you never fail to see the best in people.

You see them. Then you save them. It is . . .

Who you are.

And you have not once failed.

Except for . . .

_Her._

Oh, don't get me wrong. You saved her. Even now, she thinks you are her savior, her hero, her _star._

It makes me laugh.

Because you can save her . . .

And you are still so completely, utterly, _blind._

You don't see how lost she is.

Because she cannot see the way your eyes light up every time you see her.

The sad part is . . .

Neither can you.

I remember the Satellite, Yuusei.

You may think it's an odd thing to be thinking of now, but I do.

I remember the cats. The stray cats, to be exact.

You and I and Crow would go out cat-hunting, before Duel Monsters came to us, and bring one home to Martha. Feed it. Treasure it until she made us let it go.

You were always unraveling the yarn of your sweaters, I remember. And the cats would reach for the dangling bits.

And so we made it a game.

Like we always did.

A coin tied on the string. The cat would jump and we would pull the string away and it would miss and we would laugh and the cat would almost laugh with us.

This is different.

Not a game.

Because the coin was something shiny, something to be liked and lost.

You, Yuusei, in _her_ eyes . . .

Are not something so easily let go.

Because this time, it is not a coin at the end of the string.

It is your heart.

And you dangle it, dangerously close, to her hands, and she jumps, and you pull it away.

She doesn't notice. Neither do you, I think.

But she doesn't notice because she always lands on her feet.

Always turns herself away, promising that she'll try again.

Always tells herself that maybe you didn't understand.

You don't notice because you . . .

You . . .

Because I don't understand what's going on inside your head.

Because Izayoi Aki is a strong one.

Not because she almost defeated you, which I am proud to say only I and Kiryu have ever done.

Not because she was able to face that Senator she calls _father_ after what he said to her.

Not because she refuses to hate Divine, even after what Mikage found out about the Arcadia Movement.

Because she always lands on her feet.

But one day . . .

She will slip.

And you won't know it.

But I will.

She will.

And _that_, Yuusei, is when you'll lose her.

Because I _see,_ Yuusei.

I see the way you smile when you're in her presence.

I see the way you hide it a moment later so she doesn't see.

I see the way you turn away from her because you don't understand why.

I see the way she doesn't mind when you do it.

I see the way you care about her.

I see the way you don't notice it.

I see the string, and your heart on it.

I see her blind lunge, unaware of the trap.

I see her fall.

I see her get back up.

I see you laugh.

Because you, you, Fudou Yuusei, the One Who Sees . . .

_You_ are the blind one.

You are blind to the fact that her care for you is not friendship.

It is not need.

It is not platonic.

It is love.

You are blind to how deep that love runs.

And so . . .

She must be hurt.

Because there is no other alternative. And . . . I do not believe that you want to hurt her.

I don't think you even know she's getting hurt.

After all, _she_ doesn't . . .

Why should you?

Why _shouldn't_ you?

Why haven't you?

You, Yuusei, are the one person who never fails to notice when something's wrong. Well, you and Martha.

You, Yuusei, are the one who finds it and asks about it and stays so _damn_ unflappable about it until we finally give in and tell you about it.

But is that the extent of this . . . perception?

Can you see when your friends are hurting . . .

But not when they are needing?

Because you don't notice when she smiles at you and you almost smile back but don't.

You don't notice when she comes to you and talks to you and is just . . . _there_, because you've never had anything like it before.

You don't notice when she defends you because it's what _you_ need to hear and not what she needs to feel.

You don't try to cause her suffering.

You do anyway.

And I know, Yuusei.

That you don't mean to hurt her, no matter how much you do.

I know you don't mean to hurt her . . .

Because you _care_ about her.

Because when she puts on that mask . . .

You pull it off.

And when she can do nothing but grieve . . .

You tell her of the place that she _could_ have in the world, if she let herself.

And when her past comes to haunt her . . .

You free her.

You care so much about her that it hurts you.

And you don't understand why.

You don't understand why you care about her above the twins, above your Satellite friends, above that old man and that brute, above me.

Only that you keep running to save her.

Only that you always will.

And that, I think, is the worst part about it.

This wouldn't be so awful – so _dishonorable_ – if you didn't really care.

If you really noticed.

She puts everything on the line for you, Yuusei: her life, her powers, her heart.

And in return, you let yourself consider her a friend. Care about her like a friend.

But you don't let yourself . . .

You need to say it, Yuusei.

Not me.

Some part of you knows what it really is.

And that's the same part that keeps running from it.

She loves you.

And you dangle your heart on a string, never noticing that you're doing it, never noticing that you're hurting her, never seeing . . .

Because you're blind.

Because you're full of forced delusions.

Because she cares about you.

And because you never let yourself admit . . .

You _care_.

About _her._

And that's the most despicable thing of all.

And that's why you'll lose her – forever.

And then . . .

And then . . . you'll realize.

How much you cared.

How much you wanted.

How little you noticed.

And how right your old pal was.

Because now, you have two choices.

Leave her, refuse to let her close to your heart.

Or look at her.

Smile at her.

Know her.

Kiss her.

But don't wait until she's gone.

I did.

And I will forever regret it.

Because, Yuusei, if there's one thing - _one_ thing - that I've learned from this Signers mess, it's that you only know what you have . . .

. . . once it's gone.

Yuusei . . .

I know you love her.

I know you love her, Yuusei.

And . . .

I think it's time you knew that, too.

* * *

**Notes:** Ah, another beautiful oneshot. Well, actually, it sucks. Transitions are sucky, epic!fail on Jack's character, there are some parts that I just want to tear to pieces, and hel-_lo_, can you say _repetitive?_ But that's okay. Because the beauty of this piece, for us faithshippers, is not in the sucky writing, but in what the sucky writing represents - because let's be honest, people. What Yuusei does for Aki . . . he's the kind of person who would think he constantly saves her because he's simply that kind of person. He's never shown outward affection toward her, never hugged her, never said anything in the sense of romance to her. Aki . . . well, it's pretty obvious that Aki's in love with Yuusei. But you can tell by the way Yuusei reacts to Martha's teasing that he doesn't have much experience in the way of girls and womanly wooing (alliterations are abundant!). Come on people, unless someone - like Jack - kicks some sense into him, how long d'you think it's gonna take for him to finally realize how he loves her on his own? So, notes.

"_Because this time, it is not a coin at the end of the string. It is your heart."_  
- Which is why it's called "Heartstrings: A King's Lament," not "Jack Yells at Yuusei for Being an Idiot." You know, in case you couldn't tell.

"_Because you, you, Fudou Yuusei, the One Who Sees . . . "_  
- Taken from _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_. Basically refers to the idea that because Xander, the "normal one" of a group of freaks, is generally considered harmless, he is the one that sees the most, sees the details, sees the good and evil issues (even if he doesn't always make the right decisions), sees the personal issues as well. If you're unimportant, you're basically invisible. Jack . . . well, you wouldn't expect him to be perceptive, would you? And that's why he is. Irony, thy name is fanfiction.

"_You don't understand why you care about her above the twins, above your Satellite friends, above that old man and that brute, above me."_  
- "Brute" is Himuro. "Old man" is Yanagi.

"_But you don't let yourself . . . You need to say it, Yuusei. Not me."_  
- Love her. It's pretty obvious, but if you look at the writing, the only time Jack ever says the word "love" (except for the last few lines), it's in reference to Aki's feelings, not Yuusei's. He's trying to goad him into saying it. He fails.

"_I did. And I will forever regret it."_  
- Okay, here's the thing. I wrote these words in reference to Carly, but if you're an insane Mapshipper (Jack x Yuusei) or Careshipper (Jack x Mikage) or pretty much Jack x anyone else, this could just as well refer to them. In Mikage's case, he loved her but was so focused on Carly he lost her in the end. In Yuusei's case, he couldn't find the courage to realize it and so Yuusei fell in love with Aki. Then, of course, there is the canon thing: Jack never told Carly he loved her until she was already dying (again). And, oops, that was too late; if you look at post-Dark Signers arc interactions, the level and _depth_ of emotions between the two of them is - strained? Lacking, almost? Jack remembers Carly as a Dark Signer, and he remembers their little love confession. And she doesn't. And - well, come on, that would put a _bit_ of a damper on anyone's relationship.


End file.
